We spend most of our lives see-sawing between our feelings. Sometimes it might feel as if you are on a boat on the ocean at the mercy of the weather not realising that not only does the boat you are in have oars but it also has an engine. We wake up every morning not knowing what to expect and if we take the time to think about it most of us would probably imagine that life happens to us and how we feel depends on external circumstances quite out of our control. In this article I would like to explain how you are responsible for how you feel.
Happiness like sadness is a feeling. You can’t explain a feeling all you can do is feel it. You can explain a thought but you cannot feel a thought. A thought is not a feeling. I can think about the sea and even remember or imagine a time I spent by the sea. I can even conjure up the sound of the sea, the smell of the sea and the feel of the spray on my skin. The feeling I associate with this thought could be sadness because I am sitting on the beach crying because my wife has left me for another man or it could be joyful as I look out over the horizon in anticipation of seeing the boat that is bringing my son home from war.
The thought you think affects your mood and makes you feel how you feel. The thought propels you into the feeling and once you are feeling the feeling your thoughts are hijacked and you keep thinking those thoughts and making yourself feel more of those same feelings.
Normally when we are in “idle” mode thoughts come and go. When we give a thought our attention we are directing ourselves into a feeling. It is how we choose our thoughts that determines our mood and the way we feel. The thoughts we pay attention to create our feelings. So you can conclude that the more time you spend paying attention to happy thoughts the happier you will become. By the same token the more time you spend thinking about sad things the sadder you feel.
By thinking happy thoughts you make yourself feel happy. Thinking sad thoughts makes you feel sad. You are the only one in there with you. You are the one doing the thinking and you are the one choosing the thoughts to think. So, you are the one responsible for how you feel.
Knowing this then why won’t you choose to think the thoughts that will bring you feelings of happiness, joy and love? The reason is habit. The mind has gotten into bad habits. Because you have never taken control of your ship and directed your mind to think what you want your mind has been steering the boat. The boat has gotten used to docking at certain ports and to steer a new course to happier destinations you must now take control of the steering wheel.
Like any change you want to make in your life some effort must be exerted initially. By persistence in choosing the thoughts to focus upon you change the old pattern and you get used to a new way of being in the world.
One very good way to trick your mind into reversing its attention from sad to happy thoughts is to regularly ask your self the question “What can I be grateful for right now in my life?” Simply finding things in your life to be grateful for has the affect of changing the direction of your thoughts from negative to positive and so altering how you feel. Start the day saying thank you, spend the day saying thank you and end the day saying thank you. This is a sure way to attract more love and happiness into your life. .
Keep finding things to be really grateful for like things that you have, things that you do and things that you are and you will start feeling happier. You cannot feel bad while you are feeling grateful so gratitude is the short cut back to happiness. The happiness then makes it easier for you to remember happy memories and the cycle continues. Photographs are a great way of getting you to kick start happy memories.
Before I get out of bed every morning I say thank you to my bed and feel a great sense of appreciation that I have such a comfortable bed to sleep in. I look across at my wife and I think how thankful I am to have another day to spend with her. I look across at a photograph of myself as a boy of 3 years old and I thank the child within me. I thank the clothes I am going to put on. I say thank you to my body for being fit and healthy and the list goes on. I spend at least 10 minutes every morning doing this before even getting out of bed and continue to do this during the day as often as I remember to do. I thank everyone I meet (not out loud but in my heart) and send them good feelings. What you send out comes back to you 100 fold. I do it and it works. I am a very happy man most of the time and when I am not I know exactly how to become happy again and I do!
Here is a poem by a lady who expresses everything I say here in this post but far more eloquently. Shipwrecked by tnderhrt23